Cocklover
02-29-2008, 02:07 PM
THREE MINUTE MANAGEMENT COURSE
>>
>> Lesson One:
>> An eagle was sitting on a tree resting, doing nothing. A small rabbit
>> saw
>> the eagle and
>> asked him, "Can I also sit on my ass like you and do nothing?"
>> The eagle answered: "Sure, why not." So, the rabbit sat on the ground
>> below
>> the eagle,
>> and rested. All of a sudden, a fox appeared, jumped on the rabbit and
>> ate
>> it.
>> Management Lesson:
>> To be sitting on your ass and doing nothing, you must be sitting very
>> high
>> up.
>>
>> Lesson Two:
>> A turkey was chatting with a bull. "I would love to be able to get to
>> the
>> top of that tree,"
>> sighed the turkey, "but I haven't got the energy."
>> "Well, why don't you nibble on some of my manure droppings?" replied the
>> bull. "They
>> are packed with nutrients."
>> The turkey pecked at a lump of manure, found it actually gave him enough
>> strength to
>> reach the lowest branch of the tree. The next day, after eating a
>> little
>> more bull dung, he
>> reached the second branch.
>> Finally after a fourth night, he was proudly perched at the top of the
>> tree.
>> Soon he was
>> promptly spotted by a farmer, who shot the turkey out of the tree.
>> Management Lesson:
>> Bull Shit might get you to the top, but it won't keep you there.
>> Lesson Three:
>> A young bird was a little late trying to fly south for the winter. It
>> got so
>> cold that the bird
>> froze and fell to the ground in a large field. While it was lying
>> there, a
>> cow came by and
>> dropped some dung on it. As the frozen bird lay there in the pile of
>> cow
>> dung, it began to
>> realize how warm it was. The dung was actually thawing him out. He lay
>> there all warm and
>> happy, and soon began to sing for joy. A passing cat heard the bird
>> singing
>> and came to
>> investigate. Following the sound, the cat discovered the bird under the
>> pile of cow dung, and
>> promptly dug him out and ate him.
>> Management Lessons:
>> (1) Not everyone who shits on you is your enemy.
>> (2) Not everyone who gets you out of shit is your friend.
>> (3) And when you're in deep shit, it's best to keep your mouth shut!
>> This ends your three-minute management course.
>>
>> Lesson One:
>> An eagle was sitting on a tree resting, doing nothing. A small rabbit
>> saw
>> the eagle and
>> asked him, "Can I also sit on my ass like you and do nothing?"
>> The eagle answered: "Sure, why not." So, the rabbit sat on the ground
>> below
>> the eagle,
>> and rested. All of a sudden, a fox appeared, jumped on the rabbit and
>> ate
>> it.
>> Management Lesson:
>> To be sitting on your ass and doing nothing, you must be sitting very
>> high
>> up.
>>
>> Lesson Two:
>> A turkey was chatting with a bull. "I would love to be able to get to
>> the
>> top of that tree,"
>> sighed the turkey, "but I haven't got the energy."
>> "Well, why don't you nibble on some of my manure droppings?" replied the
>> bull. "They
>> are packed with nutrients."
>> The turkey pecked at a lump of manure, found it actually gave him enough
>> strength to
>> reach the lowest branch of the tree. The next day, after eating a
>> little
>> more bull dung, he
>> reached the second branch.
>> Finally after a fourth night, he was proudly perched at the top of the
>> tree.
>> Soon he was
>> promptly spotted by a farmer, who shot the turkey out of the tree.
>> Management Lesson:
>> Bull Shit might get you to the top, but it won't keep you there.
>> Lesson Three:
>> A young bird was a little late trying to fly south for the winter. It
>> got so
>> cold that the bird
>> froze and fell to the ground in a large field. While it was lying
>> there, a
>> cow came by and
>> dropped some dung on it. As the frozen bird lay there in the pile of
>> cow
>> dung, it began to
>> realize how warm it was. The dung was actually thawing him out. He lay
>> there all warm and
>> happy, and soon began to sing for joy. A passing cat heard the bird
>> singing
>> and came to
>> investigate. Following the sound, the cat discovered the bird under the
>> pile of cow dung, and
>> promptly dug him out and ate him.
>> Management Lessons:
>> (1) Not everyone who shits on you is your enemy.
>> (2) Not everyone who gets you out of shit is your friend.
>> (3) And when you're in deep shit, it's best to keep your mouth shut!
>> This ends your three-minute management course.