Ladies, help me out...

[CarolinaGirl82]

I have a psychotic ex-fiance who just does NOT get it. He was my high school sweetheart and we got engaged right after graduation. I broke it off about a year later for a few reasons, which I won't go into. Since then, he continues to try to talk to me and just this past birthday of mine, he wanted to TAKE ME OUT TO DINNER AS FRIENDS. He even wanted to play the piano in my wedding. I, of course, told him no and that he was not even going to be invited to the wedding and even had "look outs" at the wedding just to make sure he didn't try to crash it. To make a long story short, he sent me a friend request on Facebook and I looked at his pictures. He has our senior prom picture on there with the caption "My (EX) high school sweetheart. Too bad!" I sent him a message asking him to remove the picture....this is what I said:

Matthew:

I am not emailing to get anything bad started, but can you please take the prom picture of us off your photos? For one, it will not help you get a girlfriend because from the looks of it, potential girlfriends will think you're not over me. And two, that was around 9 years ago. Time to move on, don't you think? Again, not trying to get anything started, but I do not want my picture up there. I am also choosing not to accept your friend request. I think it's better that way...you need to live your life without constantly dwelling on "what might have been." I hope you can understand.


Ok, now the question I pose to you ladies, was I being harsh or not harsh enough? I have told him COUNTLESS numbers of times that I do not want to be friends with him. It's just better that way. What do I need to do to get my point across? It's annoying and driving me crazy...I should mention that when he and I broke up, he started trashing my name all over town, calling me every name in the book. I believe he has undiagnosed bipolar disorder. I think the people at the psychiatric hospital that he works for is rubbing off on him....Give me your opinions girls....I want this a$$hole to leave me alone!!!

Thanks :)

[palmettogirlusc]

it sounds like you were trying to be civil. if he doesn't comply with your wishes, i would get into the ugly reasons why you don't want to have anything with him. and if that doesn't work, the best thing you can do is ignore him. unfortunately since he has the rights to that photo as well, he has the ability to keep the picture up, if you like it or not. the best thing to do is just ignore it, act like you never saw it, b/c if anybody you know actually cares about what he says, imo then you don't need to have anything to do with them either.

by the sounds of his caption on the picture, the "too bad," makes it sound like he's saying he's better than you. definitely a good thing you got rid of him.

[Cocklover]

Sounds like you made a great choice to get rid of this dude!! The #1 thing that drives all guys crazy is when you ignore them, act like he doesn't exist. He eventually will give up and leave you alone. You've done everything you can on your part. Just ignore!

[CarolinaGirl82]

Sounds like you made a great choice to get rid of this dude!! The #1 thing that drives all guys crazy is when you ignore them, act like he doesn't exist. He eventually will give up and leave you alone. You've done everything you can on your part. Just ignore!


LOL...I tried that CL....it didn't work. His emails, name-calling, trash-talkin, got a whole heck of a lot worse.....I even threatened him once with a restraining order...still didn't stop him.

[palmettogirlusc]

don't even threaten him with one, that just tells him that you are thinking of him. just get one.

[CarolinaGirl82]

don't even threaten him with one, that just tells him that you are thinking of him. just get one.


That was a long time ago when I did that. I should have just went ahead and done it....

[Cocklover]

LOL...I tried that CL....it didn't work. His emails, name-calling, trash-talkin, got a whole heck of a lot worse.....I even threatened him once with a restraining order...still didn't stop him.
well it definitely sounds like if hes done all that to you CG, then it may need to get to the point of getting the police involved, hell i don't know.

[CarolinaGirl82]

well it definitely sounds like if hes done all that to you CG, then it may need to get to the point of getting the police involved, hell i don't know.


I am thinking about doing that if he doesn't comply with my wishes and be nice about it....If he starts in with all the crap again, I am going to get the court involved...

[Natalie83]

I think your letter was more than polite. You were not too harsh at all.

[CarolinaGirl82]

it sounds like you were trying to be civil. if he doesn't comply with your wishes, i would get into the ugly reasons why you don't want to have anything with him. and if that doesn't work, the best thing you can do is ignore him. unfortunately since he has the rights to that photo as well, he has the ability to keep the picture up, if you like it or not. the best thing to do is just ignore it, act like you never saw it, b/c if anybody you know actually cares about what he says, imo then you don't need to have anything to do with them either.

by the sounds of his caption on the picture, the "too bad," makes it sound like he's saying he's better than you. definitely a good thing you got rid of him.

I had someone tell me that I can report the photo to Facebook or something like that and they can get it removed. I don't know what that's about..never done that before.

[palmettogirlusc]

you may be able to if you go to the picture you may be able to "report this photo" or something. but normally thats for inappropriate content. the developers may find the situation too petty for them to bother with it. but you could try.