Southern Tide, Southern Proper, Southern Marsh, etc
What the hell is this trend? Put a stereotype of being Southern on a t-shirt and sell it. I saw one today with a glass of iced tea. I wondered if the guy knew how ridiculous he looked walking around with a tshirt that had an iced tea on it. But then again, he had the YETI hat, which maybe is a theme - his drobe is all about drinks and coolers. I get it.
Well, I have to say, at least they are making alot of money. I appreciate people who are able to make alot of money using a gimmick. I have an idea of my own.
I'm going to create a tshirt line called NORTHERN TIDE. It's going to have things associated with the NORTH. Therefore college students in Cleveland, Pittsburgh, Indianapolis and Michigan can wear it. After all they should be proud of their craterized hellhole states. I'm going to have tshirts with a can of Alpo with a spork, representing the typical lunch diet of a person from the Buckeye state. Then I'll have another tshirt with a huge pothole with a mattress shoved in it. Then I'll have another one with a woman pushing a shopping cart around Cleveland in the snow, and another one showing an Oldsmobile Cutlass Supreme with no muffler covered in salt. Then instead of a southern gun theme like the one I saw yesterday, I'm going to have a northern gun theme which is an AK with Chicago Cubs colors.
One of these southern shirts also has one called "Cities of The South" with Charleston on it and a picture of (you guessed it) Rainbow Row. I'm gonna do a Northern Cities theme, with Toledo (showing a line of unemployed auto workers), Detroit (showing a mayor and police chief having affairs with their secretaries), and Gary Indiana (showing people bathing in sewage right next to a steel mill). That way all the 127 or so people left living in those cities (the ones who haven't moved to Summerville) can be proud of where they are from. After all, I have to give them props for actually staying up there.
The north will rise again.