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Old 12-21-2012, 10:29 PM   #1
The Yancey
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Default I broke my wiener

Not in half, mind you. More like a stress fracture. Happened back in the spring during some overly acrobatic whoopie. I thought that it was just a little sprain or something. Instead of getting better though it has been getting worse. Was beginning to really hurt a bit during erections. Sooo, they checked it out during this slew of exams I am having at Mayo. Seems that some plaque formed at the injury site. The result is Peyronie's Disease. My wand of delight is turning from a lance into a corkscrew. That should make for some interesting times at the urinal. Guess I'l have to change my line from offering to plumb a babe's depths to asking ii I can pop her cork. There isn't a good treatment option either. They can try to remove some tissue from the other side to help straighten it. That results in shortening of the unit. Yeah, like that is gonna happen. The doc told me that most guys opted out of having a link removed from the chain. Their splints, implants, and other methods. None work all that well. They will have a guy who is a world authority in this to come down from Rochester to take a look. He has developed some sort of laser surgery for it. We'll see. They found some weird diastolic heart failure too but it is mild and I am more concerned with my scepter of power. Getting old ain't for sissies.
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Old 12-21-2012, 10:39 PM   #2
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Default Re: I broke my wiener

Um, condolences?

how is She?
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Old 12-21-2012, 10:50 PM   #3
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Default Re: I broke my wiener

What the hell just happened here.
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Old 12-21-2012, 10:57 PM   #4
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Default Re: I broke my wiener

Yancey I do believe that if you tell your story to Dos Equis they may replace that guy in the commercials with your stories.
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Old 12-21-2012, 11:03 PM   #5
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Default Re: I broke my wiener


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Old 12-21-2012, 11:08 PM   #6
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Default Re: I broke my wiener

Breakin your wiener is the worst.
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Old 12-21-2012, 11:17 PM   #7
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Default Re: I broke my wiener



Too much information
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Old 12-21-2012, 11:47 PM   #8
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Default Re: I broke my wiener

Quote:
They will have a guy who is a world authority in this to come down from Rochester to take a look.
So he's a pecker inspector from Rochester? Can't go wrong with that.
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Old 12-21-2012, 11:49 PM   #9
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Default Re: I broke my wiener

Quote:
Originally Posted by cocky0 View Post
So he's a pecker inspector from Rochester? Can't go wrong with that.
Points!!!!
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Old 12-21-2012, 11:53 PM   #10
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Default Re: I broke my wiener

There was an old man from Rochester
Whose job it was an inspector
When he arrived at my crib,
He said "what you done did"
That's when I showed him my broke pecker
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Old 12-22-2012, 12:26 AM   #11
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Default Re: I broke my wiener

I've heard of that condition and it sounds terrible
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Old 12-22-2012, 12:33 AM   #12
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Default Re: I broke my wiener

ĦAy, caramba! - Cabaco
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Old 12-22-2012, 12:38 AM   #13
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Default Re: I broke my wiener

Quote:
Originally Posted by The Yancey View Post
Not in half, mind you. More like a stress fracture. Happened back in the spring during some overly acrobatic whoopie. I thought that it was just a little sprain or something. Instead of getting better though it has been getting worse. Was beginning to really hurt a bit during erections. Sooo, they checked it out during this slew of exams I am having at Mayo. Seems that some plaque formed at the injury site. The result is Peyronie's Disease. My wand of delight is turning from a lance into a corkscrew. That should make for some interesting times at the urinal. Guess I'l have to change my line from offering to plumb a babe's depths to asking ii I can pop her cork. There isn't a good treatment option either. They can try to remove some tissue from the other side to help straighten it. That results in shortening of the unit. Yeah, like that is gonna happen. The doc told me that most guys opted out of having a link removed from the chain. Their splints, implants, and other methods. None work all that well. They will have a guy who is a world authority in this to come down from Rochester to take a look. He has developed some sort of laser surgery for it. We'll see. They found some weird diastolic heart failure too but it is mild and I am more concerned with my scepter of power. Getting old ain't for sissies.

Sorry, Yance.

Sounds like you got, um, screwed.
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Old 12-22-2012, 04:12 AM   #14
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Default Re: I broke my wiener

Ouch.

Good luck with that.
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Old 12-22-2012, 04:39 AM   #15
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Default Re: I broke my wiener

Ouch. I hope you can get things straightened out.
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Old 12-22-2012, 05:42 AM   #16
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Default Re: I broke my wiener

Which meds did they prescribe you and did you pop a few before posting this?

P.s. Sorry about your penis.
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Old 12-22-2012, 09:39 AM   #17
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Default Re: I broke my wiener

Gonna have to change your name to Elrod.
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Old 12-22-2012, 09:59 AM   #18
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Default Re: I broke my wiener

I have to be honest, this made me laugh. I too have sustained injuries to the wonder wand. Nothing resulting in....umm, excess bend I guess you'd say, but I have had a bleeder before. Sorry to hear about your wiener.
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Old 12-22-2012, 10:04 AM   #19
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Default Re: I broke my wiener

Wow, this is kind if a lot to process in the morning after waking up from some glorious dreams. Best wishes for you Yancey. I hope you take the straight and even path, so to speak.
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Old 12-22-2012, 10:07 AM   #20
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Default Re: I broke my wiener

Quote:
Originally Posted by chapincock View Post
I have to be honest, this made me laugh. I too have sustained injuries to the wonder wand. Nothing resulting in....umm, excess bend I guess you'd say, but I have had a bleeder before. Sorry to hear about your wiener.
If you can't find some humor in the bad things in life it can be hard to get through. I'm the one with the weird wiener and I am laughing too. Kinda. Sorta.
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